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Sexual assault and domestic abuse exams are performed by specially trained registered nurses, nurse practitioners, physician assistants and physicians. Not every hospital or health facility has someone on staff that is specially trained to perform a forensic exam. In Solano County, exams are done at North Bay Medical Center in Fairfield and Kaiser Permanente Medical Center in Vallejo. In Napa County, exams are done at Queen of the Valley Medical Center in Napa. In Marin County, exams are done at Kaiser Permanente Medical Center in San Rafael. Per Penal Code, exams are provided at no cost to victims.

For general questions, you can call the Nation Sexual Assault Hotline at 800-656-HOPE (4673) or to find out where to go in your area.

It is normal for survivors to react in shock and disbelief, followed by extraordinary distress including anger, fear, confusion, frustration, guilt, and grief. That tumultuous reaction does not mean you are “going crazy”. Rape Trauma Syndrome or RTS is a specific category of post-traumatic stress disorder, brought on by intense feelings of helplessness. RTS is specific to the experience of the rape survivor and usually includes issues of intimacy, touching, sexual function, and shame, and is usually expressed in three phases:

• Stage One: Acute
  Occurs immediately after the assault, includes feelings of disbelief, shock, shame and guilt.
  
  
• Stage Two: Outward Adjustment
  Days, weeks or months following the assault, the survivor resumes what appears to be a “normal” life. Inside, however, there is considerable turmoil which can manifest itself in depression, powerlessness, anxiety, or re-triggering.
  
  
• Stage Three: Resolution
  After the survivor has dealt emotionally with the trauma the sexual assault is no longer the central focus in the survivor’s life. They begin to recognize that while she/he will never forget the assault, the pain and memories associated with it are lessening.

The only person who can truly stop an assault is the perpetrator. Fighting back is not always the safest thing to do. Victims usually have a gut feeling if fighting back might help, or might put them in greater danger. None of us know how we would react in an attack, unless it happens. During an attack humans usually react in one of three ways: flight, fight or freeze. If you freeze and are unable to fight back, you did not do something wrong, this is a normal, instinctual reaction. The most important thing you can do is survive the assault. You survived, which means you did the right thing.

You may find that friends and family expect that you should be ready to move on with your life as soon as they are ready to stop thinking about it. Those who understand sexual assault know that the trauma is not a simple thing to recover from. Being assaulted affects everyone differently, and everyone recovers at his or her own pace. Most people who are assaulted experience symptoms of Rape Trauma Syndrome and, although symptoms do get better over time, it is very normal to continue to think about and deal with the assault long after it happened. Getting counseling can provide you with a safe person to talk to and skills to cope with your feelings and reactions. Try not to put too much pressure on yourself to react or feel a certain way. There is no time period or deadline when you should “get over it”. Healing from such a violation is a complicated and individual process. Take as long as you need to let yourself heal.